the shooting trip wif the guys yest was fun.We get most of it done.The sunset n all.I cnt wait for it to fin.
the only gurl yest...i was being bullied by them.haha...all's gd..cuz i dun haf to do anithing xcept to chip in sum nice ideas.
Andy's our new member.welcome man...ehhe
Roza's nt der yest...so Hotsytotsy came in later to fill up the pl.My tummy making unpleasant noises n its still sick.
Wad makes it worst its the inner self.I gotta get a grip of my self...i definately will.I will nt let ppl step on my head n make a fool of it.U will soon noe whu i am.....
Gd things come later...
I believe by the saying...."the closest fren u haf...can u be the one whu stabs u from the back.....cuz...he/she noes u the best"
And that is wad im goin thru now.Words cant describe how infuriated i felt.
Dirty names are spat at me...i wipe it away...soon tears started to form in my eyes.
Luckily...there r still ppl outder whu stands by me.Whu noes im not all of a DIRT.
I cnt do much to stop once annoying...jealousy...Foul mouth...
All i cn do.......is to pray that God shows real truth bt all this.
Oh yesh...I am a muslim....N i was taught to stay patience to unpleasant things which happend.
Its up to everyone to judge me......i never force nor pay frenship....
they haf eyes...haf heart...to make a gd choice.
To you........
I hope one day God opens ya heart to see things clearly And judge it wif open minds.Expose yaself more...learn to appreciate ppl...n dun let ya anger took control
Eveyone makes mistake.Noone is perfect.We live to learn frm mistakes that we did n change.
Thank you to frens whu chose to belive him... n i thank also to frens to chose to stand by me.......
I am sorry to the ppl i misjudge all this while.It juz takes a foul mouth to ruin EVERYTHING.
I believe by the saying...."the closest fren u haf...can u be the one whu stabs u from the back.....cuz...he/she noes u the best"
And that is wad im goin thru now.Words cant describe how infuriated i felt.
Dirty names are spat at me...i wipe it away...soon tears started to form in my eyes.
Luckily...there r still ppl outder whu stands by me.Whu noes im not all of a DIRT.
I cnt do much to stop once annoying...jealousy...Foul mouth...
All i cn do.......is to pray that God shows real truth bt all this.
Oh yesh...I am a muslim....N i was taught to stay patience to unpleasant things which happend.
Its up to everyone to judge me......i never force nor pay frenship....
they haf eyes...haf heart...to make a gd choice.
To you........
I hope one day God opens ya heart to see things clearly And judge it wif open minds.Expose yaself more...learn to appreciate ppl...n dun let ya anger took control
Eveyone makes mistake.Noone is perfect.We live to learn frm mistakes that we did n change.
Thank you to frens whu chose to belive him... n i thank also to frens to chose to stand by me.......
I am sorry to the ppl i misjudge all this while.It juz takes a foul mouth to ruin EVERYTHING.
"There's nothing more pathetic than dreaming dreams you know can never come true"..........
ok...my entries has been so boring dese days n i (know some ppl will say...its alwasy boring... :))
but its ok.
A recap bt my lil disappearance.Was out on fri to checkout R.D.I. Atfirst dad says it was ok for me to study there.After goin for enquiries...i realised that it is sooo expensive that i think twice of studying there.Its a 3 year course n graduating wif a degree but the fee is a bomb!I kept askin everyone in my family bt the decision im doin...n i wuldnt want ma parents to sacrifice their hard-earned juz for this.i will definately feel heavy bt making my parents living in 'money-probs'...its much nicer than spelling it as 'debts'....
so..i decided to let it go.I cn always take a degree n master fta it.Insyallah..i wanna go as far as possible.I wan to make my parents live in luxury...n im workin towards it.
Getting too demanding is a big prob n especially wif a 21 yr old.I dun understand some ppl whu demands too muc from their parents.im nt sayin im a fillial daughter...but atleast i tried n never demands things which i noe i cnt get within days.I grow up from a normal family....unless my dad's a tycoon...i wuldnt think twice of askin ANYTHING....
Its sad that some tends to tell the whole world the bad sides of their parents...i mean...its a personal thing u shuld keep it frm being known cuz it reflects back to u....
hmm...i mean...different ppl has different way of seeing things........
as for me...........i wouldnt be that bad to demand unnecesarry things juz to keep up wif the things ard me.
pls..........parents work their ass out to get the freaking money...n dun juz reachout ya hands n demand money!
Try treating this to ya parents....i swear....u'll get it back wen ya older...
aniways...sat was awesome...eventho its a lil tiring.I had a hell of a great time wif besti...hotsytotsy n indra.Dearest dad allowed us to drive his car.And being the "strict" driver...i was licky i didnt sit next to besti.haha...so..im being replace by indra.poor him....got shouted afew times cuz of being "street-smart"...ehhe...tapi takperlah...its all gd.We reached home safely...hehe
i cnt wait to get my license.And i wan a mini to drive ard.hehe...isnt it nice...
nah...this is juz a lil thot of mine...hopefully it will come true.... :)
The shots r gd....But the weather is not on our side.Im nt cursing cuz things happend for a reason...
For the great help...everyone gets a KFC!hehe
Im juz thankful to the ppl whu help me out....
I love u ppl...*nt only cuz u'all help me...but u ppl r juz...GEREK ar...hhehehe
Many more of driving ar besti...shiok ar............next time.....
KL ar...hahahaha
Lover's day for me is EVERYDAY.Just dat...i can see alotta ppl buyin bouquets and spending on it.This time,i didnt see ppl in skul giving eachother except for some of my chi classmates giving out chocs.
I received a msg frm Narny..it makes my day.ATleast i noe im still a fren.
But im sad cuz...one year ago...i lost some ppl...
Sometimes i wish im 'someone'...for atleast...if ppl wans to hate me...they will think twice.
But im juz a normal person and i hate to impress ppl even how rich or well-known dey are.Everyone shuld be treated fairly..be it ya a rich man's daughter/son...celebrity...millionare..an orphan.. etc...
I was cryin to Hotsytotsy juznow.Bt my life and ppl ard me.Its sad wen things happend n u've been label whereas u dun even do anithing wrong.And y arent the bad ones receving all those punishments...
Hotsytotsy says..Gd things comes later...
im quite convince....n i feel much better.
Atleast theres sumone whu care to listen to my woes.Unlike roza,i gets worried easily.Its in my nature.Everyone's different rite... :)
Hotsytotsy bought me a Wedges...i loike it so much.thankis!
And i got him Prada.
Thanx for being der....
i juz wanna share this gd news....
sissy passed her Olevels...n its way expected.
she got 4as and 2 bs.
The sickening part...she keep askin...
Wher shuld i cont my studies....JC or Poly...
She wans biomed so badly...hopefully she get in...
ive bn lazy to update.yest was ok.went Gashaus.
right after...met parents for dinner at tamp.
Pretty much my boring weekend.
Anyone care to be my model for next week?
I juz nid uniques faces...
u nid not worry bt ya size..height...the way u look...
Juz leave me msg on my tagboard :)
Im in 3d class but im not doint anything got to do wif 3d.James on course so we r left doin things on our own.I jjuz dun haf that mood of doing 3d now.I finished up my logo n namecard yest.It took me 5 hrs to do it...n hopefully everything will be ok.Lots more to catchup.Our movie proj r left stagnant wif alota conflicts n hard headed ppl involved.first...it started all rite...but in the middle...everyone tend to be goin the opposite ways.Personal probs r part of it,time contraint is another...
im realli having headache thinking bt all this.Nora said its better if we 4get all bt it...But hey....i dun fuckin care if this is a normal xtra non-graded project...But sadly..it is...
And i dun wan a fuckin xtra time sittin ma ass here for another 6 fuckin months wif all this people...pls...not at all...
sumtimes..i juz feel its so hard to understand ppl.They tend to misunderstood wad ure tryin to say.
And thats one of the reason y i haf lil frens.I chose frens wisely....n i chose the ones whu not only be der for me wen im laffin...but also wen im crying...
Fri:Like i said..roza bought me two pretty tees n a starfish bookmark.So nice of her tho.
It starts like this...
#rd of feb..is our 2rd anniversary.I wanted to give Hotsytotsy a surprise so i told him to mit me up at woodlands n we take a bus to jurong pt.My intention is to go science centre.We took the hr bus ride n kaboop...Salah bus la babe.N he kept askin.."arent we suppose to be here"...and der it goes...my surprise are ruin.We took the wrong bus..hahaha (i cnt stop laffin at my self for being a fool..but atleast..i try to make it a surprise.)
So we make our way to science centre n hes still clueless as to wher im bringing him.And he was shocked went i ask for two tix to The Art of Starwars.hehe...
Both of us are fans of starwars.So..i wan to mark this day a special one n to a pl wher both of us enjoy n wuld stay hours in it.And my 36bucks is worth it!
the pics will b up later.
We spent hours in the gallery.I realli enjoyed my time der.And...a medaliion as a souvenier is double coolness.Its limited edi n 20 000 pieces onli... *winks*
I think uploading the pics will tell the whole experience of us der.
We headed down to sim lim to get my mini dv.Den walk ard abit..and off back home.
Im thankful God make me meet him...i love u Hotsytotsy
Sat:
I was totally mad wif Hotsytotsy.Shooting for my tv commercial was suppose to start but alot of things slowed me down.After much crying n shouting...we headed to my pl.Danny backout since hes sick...so left nab n Hotsytotsy.
We play doll-me-up.hehe...i love this soo much but i hate wearing makeup...
I wan more of this session...hehe
Everything went pretty well.....alhamdulilah...im thankful to them for helping me.When i got the bucks...insyallah ill treat them.Alot of reshooting were done.But luckily its nab...i didnt feel too awkward wif nab n hotsytotsy.Hehe...we make my room upside down.
After all the shoots...we took crazee pics in my room.hehe...
I love you besti n U hotsytotsy...
Thanx fr the great help :)
Sun:Went to mit the grp at Ap's hse to do our movie.We ended up slacking at his hse n had our tummy full of deelicious mee soto.haha...
And now..the bleeding comes back...n im freaking out.Im scared of visitng the doc n got admitted to the hospital...
Is this some way God tried to punish me?but why me?
Oh ya...i received a letter from skul.I thot its a letter of complaint since im always skipping S & W...but it came as a gd shock...i got a GPA for my studies!wooooooohoooooooo...richer abit la dey..hehe
Roza gave me a birthday prezie!i thot i'll never get anithing animore since my birthday was last yest...
hehe...i requested for a star...n she got me a starfish...hehe
ive yet to open the prezie...
im gonna open it wen i reached hm.... :)
more update later.
So todae marks the 2rd anniversary of Hotsytotsy and me.The long winding and uneven patches of life has made us more forgiving,more loving,to tolearte eachother,understand,Commitment and lots more
I hope For many more happy and sad days together wif u.May it be smooth or rough..let us go thru it together.
I dun haf the money to spend as much as i wanted to make it a memorable one but onli this 'copycat' poem from me.The very advance flats i got u...very much conclude the whole thing.
Iloveyou so..so very much.
i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go,my dear;and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)
i fear
no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you
here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart
i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)
by e.e. cummings
